Today was hard

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This morning I had to be to work an hour earlier than usual. Which meant waking Roo up early too.

For the third time this week, she woke up scream-crying. She repeated what she had said before “I’m still sleepy. I’m tired.” Today she added in a “I want a nap!”

Then proceeded to thrash around and shriek whenever I tried to touch her. At least today she didn’t try to rip her clothes off once I managed to get them on.

Its mornings like this that get to me. They wouldn’t happen if I could just say “ok, go back to sleep” and let her. They make me wonder if she’s getting enough of me. Maybe I can stay up late to get my other things done, and spend the entire evening focused on her. But when I do that I find myself losing my patience and getting short with her because I’ve spent all day with 16 5-year-olds, 14 of them boys (not exaggerating) and I’m all tapped out of my have fun with kids quota for the day.

And I just wish, so hard, that there can be a way for me to stay home with her.